25. 9:00 p.m. - 9:30 p.m.

I wasn't supposed to stay at her house that night, but I'm there when she comes home. She's suprised. More surprised to see that I've gone through her bag.

It was just sitting there on the couch. An overnight bag. Inside, a red sequined bra and matching panties. Deoderant. Other bathroom things. She must have kept a toothbrush at his place or she was going to pick one up on the way--not wanting to chance taking the one from here, forgetting it there, and being on the spot.

She'd once said that she'd be there when I ran out of road.[mp3]º "Take your time; I ain't goin' nowhere,"º is how she put it.

I ran through all the scenarios while I was waiting for her to come home: the how could yous, you're such a hypocrites and the I'd always suspecteds. But when she was standing in front of me there was nothing. She saw the open bag sitting next to me. Confusion turned to realization...

"It's not what you think."

"I expected something less cliche."

"It's for you."

"But you weren't expecting me."

"It's not what you think."

I got up to leave.

... turned to tears turned to begging.

I pulled free from her grasp, picked up the dainties, meaning to wave them, questioning her. I threw them at her instead. She turned just as they slapped her face.

"It was a surprise."

"Understatement."

"Lessons."

"Lessons?"

"Dancing... dancing lessons. For you."

"You already know how to dance. You move like a poem."º

"This is different. Belly... belly dancing lessons."

"You're a fucking liar, Laur."

"No."

"Prove it."

"How."

"Dance."

"Here? Now?"

Yes! Here! Now!

"I'm no good. I just started."

I made for the door.

"Okay."

She positions herself. Takes a stance.

"Put it on."

As soon as I say it, I want to take it back,º but a word once uttered can't be recalled.º

She slowly strips. She bends, picks up the costume. Pulls it over nothing but her skin.º She looks at me. She's nothing, now. A shell, disappointed that she didn't throw me out. You hypocrite.

She takes the stance. Looks down at herself. Comes into herself. I can see her changing, trying to defy me. She glares at me, and starts to move. She's in her element, confident.

I am overcome.

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