2. 9:30 a.m. - 10:00 a.m.

Laur was a follower of Eckhart Tolle. She believed that to complain makes one a victim. I remember her sitting on our bed, quoting to me from The Power of Now.

"If you find your here and now intolerable and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally. If you want to take responsibility for your life, you must chose one of those three options and you must chose now. Then accept the consequences."

Obviously, she chose option one.

I think it was the anger that did it. She didn't know where it came from and neither did I but it was always there, scratching at the surface.

This one time, I came home and she was sitting in the wing chair looking very blank.

"I spit on someone."

I waited. She cracked.

"I was crossing Elm going to the World's Biggest and some man in a Lincoln almost ran me over so I kicked his car and he yelled something at me and I spit on him through the open window of his car. I'm standing in the middle of Yonge and--what the fuck, D? What's wrong with me?"

I wanted to say "Nothing" but couldn't. Instead, I moved forward and rested a hand on her. She took it in hers, fell forward, and sobbed into me. She didn't cry often but when she did, it was severe.

We decided to head out for dinner--try and forget it, or maybe talk it through, see if that would help.

She came out of the shower smelling clean and youngº and changed into that red wrap skirt I like so much--the one that makes me stay a few steps behind when we walk down the street.

I was with her when she bought it. In the back of the store--she pulls open the door and steps out and just bam! I was speechless. She asked what I thought and I said that it really complimented her shape. She smiled and stepped back into the change room.

Seeing her from behind I thought 'You have a scrumptious ass. That skirt is perfect. The Mona Lisa of asses in that skirt. The Northern Lightsº snugly draped in smooth rayon."

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